It would be so nice to know your purpose with 100% certainty wouldn’t it? To have someone hand it to you all gift wrapped and specially made just for you. Then you could go through each day with the certainty that you are on purpose without any doubt, uncertainty or fear about moving forward.
But life doesn’t seem to work like that. We fumble around trying different things, doing different jobs, different relationships, going to seminars and workshops, doing vision quests and still hoping for our purpose to drop in to our lap.
A few years ago, I came across an article in a newsletter by Marcus Buckingham that really helped me let go of the idea of discovering my purpose in a one-off moment of epiphany. He boldly stated,
“Goals, dreams, and vision are important, but they do not provide the answer to living a fulfilling life.
Pay attention to those activities, instances and events in life that fill you up; that teach you, guide you and sustain you. Like small flames, they can be fanned into bigger fires with a little attention. Your strongest life is built through a continuous practice of designing moment by moment.”
Are you registering this moment and what it is about this moment that is filling you up and nurturing you, even a little bit? Or are you watching reruns in your mind of the past, or continuously visioning the future because the present moment is not giving you any sustenance.
From this simple statement, I have developed my own personal strategy for happiness which boils down to “Try lots of things. Notice the stuff you like. Find ways to have more of that stuff and less of the other stuff you don’t like.”
Even if you are in a dead end job now, is there anything, even the smallest thing, about that job that you enjoy? Yes, going home at the end of the day can be included 😉 but what else? Maybe it’s the satisfaction of seeing a clean floor or cup. Maybe it’s brightening someone’s day with a smile as you serve their coffee. Maybe it’s the team meeting once a week where you get to have a laugh in amongst all the seriousness of the rest of the week. Maybe its getting the accounts to balance. Pay attention. Notice the moments where you experience event the slightest joy, happiness, or satisfaction.
Buckingham concluded with
“Moments matter most. Build off of a few strong moments, follow the path they lay out for you, and trust your direction. They will not let you down.”
If you still feel like you haven’t found your purpose, the following EFT tapping may help you let go of the idea of finding it “out there” and instead help you focus on the moments that are happening right here and now that are giving hints to build on.
Try saying the following Setup phrases while tapping on the karate chop point:
“Even though I haven’t yet found my purpose; the years and months keep rolling by; sometimes I feel so lost; not belonging or fitting in; I want to deeply and completely accept myself and the journey that has brought me to this moment.
Even though I might not like where I am right now, I feel like I’m wasting my life sometimes; that I’m missing out on something important; I acknowledge these feelings right here, right now.
Even though it would be nice to find my gift-wrapped purpose and be free of all this uncertainty, I wonder if I could be open to noticing what nourishes and fulfils me even a little bit right now.”
Tapping through the remaining EFT tapping points, moving on the next point after each phrase:
- I want to feel on purpose
- I want to know what I should be doing
- I want to know that I’m on the right track
- Instead of feeling lost and fumbling around in the dark.
- If only I knew what my purpose was then I would feel happier, more fulfilled
- What can I begin to notice today about the things I do enjoy?
- What moments of the day do I feel most fulfilled?
- Is it Ok if I never consciously know my true purpose?
- Even though I think I should know, I should be able to figure it out…
- I should be able to-tune in to it intuitively
- I choose to be gentle and compassionate with myself as I explore my life for the moments that matter
- And focus on having more of those.
Remember to continue doing rounds of EFT adjusting the words to the thoughts and feelings that a coming up.
Leave a comment about what insights this post gave you about your life’s purpose.